Surely, none of us would have chosen to become parents in the first place, had we thought we would end up angry, frustrated, nagging, stressed out, sleep deprived, nervous wrecks?
We become parents with the sole intention of enjoying every moment with our children, and to love, cherish and appreciate the joy they bring.
Ok, admittedly before our bundles of joy arrived, we envisioned a beautifully decorated nursery, where our new arrival would sleep like a baby, peacefully through the night.
We never thought as far as the colic, teething, bedwetting, sleepless nights, and the crayon all over the walls, or the bombsite a toddler would create, in their once beautiful bedroom.
And it’s doubtful any of us could have imagined tantrums in the supermarket and brawls on the playground, as we daydreamed of building sand castles at the beach and sunny days playing in the park?
But have our children let us down, or have we all just been naively seduced by the notion of what parenting should be like?
The truth is parenting can be a joyous experience full of fun times together, but like any other relationship, it does take a lot of time and patience to build rewarding, loving relationships with our children.
It doesn’t matter what parenting tools or techniques we use, or how much advice we receive from others, without enough time to devote to our children, it’s all worthless and ineffective.
The good news, however, is that it only takes time to build those happy, healthy, and successful relationships with our children.
But we have to make the time for it.
Having too many things on our ‘to do list’ takes our time and attention away from our children.
We would certainly all be more effective and more relaxed parents, if we did not have so many plates spinning in the air. The frustration arises, when we try to keep all those plates in the air and the inevitable happens, we drop a few.
As our children are those closest to us, they’re naturally more loving and forgiving than anyone or anything else in our life.
We certainly can put them off a lot easier than we can our Boss or our Tax Return. Sadly, for those reasons they are the ones who suffer the most when we are busy doing too many other things.
Even when we are spending time with our children, all too often we tend to still be thinking of past work or relationship issues, or fretting about the future, instead of concentrating on them.
Understandably with our busy schedules and hectic lifestyles, our minds can and do easily wander from the trivia of our children’s conversations or complaints, to our more pressing grown up issues.
We will all be more efficient and effective parents though if, we learn how to streamline our commitments. For parenting to run smoothly, we have to be organised, but too many diaries, schedules, plans and to do lists, just keeps us constantly busy.
Seeing in black and white everything everyone else wants us to do, and how much has to be done, can feel daunting. And putting a slot in our diaries for our children’s ‘Us Time’ can easily get lost.
The less plates we have spinning, the less breakages we are responsible for, so it’s time to drop those ‘Time Takers’ once and for all.
Keeping one diary and one intention for the day; to be happy spending time doing what we love, with those we love most, is all we really need.